Try not to breathe by Jennifer R. Hubbard
Kindle Edition, Viking Children's, 2012. Viking Children's Books,
ISBN 9780670013906.
(Age: 14+) Recommended. Sixteen year old Ryan is a misfit. He spends
a lot of time at the local waterfall, because it makes him feel
alive when he actually walks under it. He has recovered from time
spent in a mental hospital after attempting suicide, and he's
finding that living with the hovering of his parents and the rumours
at school are very difficult to cope with. When Nicki , a young girl
who also spends time at the waterfall, badges into his life and
starts asking him questions about why he tried to commit suicide, he
finds that he must confront some important questions. Nicki too has
to face some things from her past.
The story is told by Ryan in the first person and as a reader I got
to know him very well as he tried to navigate his way back into a
world where he felt normal. I could sympathise with his
over-protective mother, who made sure that all pills were locked
away and the car out of bounds, but also with Ryan who desperately
needs to be treated normally. When irrepressible Nicki asks him
questions that he has not even answered for his doctor, he knows
that he will have to help her in her quest for answers about her
father, especially when she decides that a psychic might be able to
help.
Hubbard has written an engrossing and ultimately uplifting story
about a very difficult subject. She has delved into depression and
how people are able to hide it from those around them. She examines
the aftermath of suicide and attempted suicide and the feelings of
those who are affected by it. She also looks at how difficult it is
for the survivor of suicide to feel normal and to carry on, when
everyone knows what has happened. This book has made me much more
conscious of the effects of depression and attempts at suicide.
Teens reading this will be able to identify with a great story
written in a positive and gripping way, while gaining understanding
of the feeling of alienation and isolation of those who are
struggling with depression and the aftermaths of suicide attempts.
Pat Pledger