The crying room by Gretchen Shirm

Susie works as a facilitator in the 'crying room', a place for people to come and release their suppressed tears. Bizarrely, the other short-term job she takes on is contributing to a laughter sound track for films. Is Susie a worker in some kind of future world, or perhaps, as we read on, this is all just a chapter in a novel that Susie’s niece Monica is writing about the emotional world of the people she knows.

The focus of Shirm’s book is relationships, particularly the relationships between mother and daughter, between sisters, and between aunt and niece. Bernie loves her daughters Susie and Alison, but her constant criticism of them has led to a schism in their relationship. Alison is like her mother, not able to express love for her daughter Monica. Susie, though weighed down with self-doubt and sorrow, opens her heart to her niece Monica and takes her into her home.

The book takes a very unusual form, with a chapter printed but striked out, as Monica decides she doesn’t want to include it. Other chapters have little side notes telling what Monica is doing at the time. It is then that the reader realises that there is more than one perspective to this storytelling.

We are presented with scenes that provide insight into the characters, and how they are shaped by their family experiences, the conflict, misunderstandings and careless cruelties. Bernie and her daughter Alison often act coldly and unsympathetically but it is the two of them that act decisively to protect a bumbling bank robber about to be confronted by police. But neither of them seem able to demonstrate caring towards their own family members.

A scene I found particularly authentic is when Bernie expresses irritation at a child ‘wailing’ in a café, blaming the parents for the child’s ‘whingeing’, whereas Susie simply crouches down and shares a silvery shell with her, capturing the child’s wondering gaze. It is a scene described with such clarity it is like watching a film.

Shirm’s book shares many recognisable moments in family relationships, and explores questions about how people are shaped and influenced by their upbringings. There is conflict and resentment, but ultimately a kind of comfort and understanding.

Themes: Families, Relationships, Grief, Conflict.

Helen Eddy